LONGLISTED FOR THE WELLCOME PRIZE 2019. 'I loved Matthew Sperling's sly, subversive novel, a wickedly funny tale of how to come out on top in a fake news world.' Olivia Laing, author of The Lonely City 'Outrageous, sexy and funny. Sperling writes with the caustic economy of Waugh or Spark, but his characters have more heart, including the sock-puppets.' Luke Kennard, author of The Transition 'A tale about steroids which seems to be on steroids itself: sleek, muscular and just slightly too real.' Kate Clanchy, author of Meeting the English Good things can happen when you do bad things At thirty, Ned is in a rut. His girlfriend has dumped him, his job is boring and he lives in a dismal bedsit. While others around him climb the property ladder and get ahead, he seems destined to remain one of life's plodders. Encouraged by a friend to try using steroids to bulk up his frame, Ned is pleased to discover a new vitality within himself. Physical changes are only the beginning: his mental state is clearer, he feels more confident and, most thrillingly of all, friends and lovers alike seem compelled by this new improved Ned. Using his knowledge of the murky yet surprising online world of steroids, Ned begins to build a business and discovers that his talents can take him further than he ever thought possible. But when is new life is threatened, he finds himself doing things he never would have dared to do before. And it all seems to be going fine . . .